5 Ways to Live a More Present and Connected Life

Are You Ready to Wake Up?

Are you feeling lost, stuck, and totally hopeless? Confused about which direction to go? Is life is getting busy and hard to navigate? Are you awake right now? I get it! I ask these same questions and it took me years to understand how to shed the layers of protective conditioning that kept me asleep for over 43 years. It takes what it takes, we all have our journies and we are all ready when we are ready. Having patience for your time to awaken is part of learning how to love ourselves, a part of learning how to have deep patience. Most importantly, a part of realizing that we have zero control and surrendering into deep trust and the belief that we are supported.

This topic is my favorite subject to learn more about and share with others. My passion and purpose is to learn how to live a more present and connected life amid this insane and chaotic world we are experiencing. There is a lot of pressure from several different avenues, forcing us to live in our survival state nervous systems. We are spent, burnt out, and desperate for a reprieve that seems far away and far-fetched. This is challenging, but there is hope, I promise!

It’s the Baby Steps That Count!

What I have learned throughout my journey is that it is the small steps that allow the change we crave to occur. My mission is to encourage those on a healing journey that it is more about the simple and gentle actions rather than the larger, more dramatic ones. It is one aligned baby step after the next. This is where the magic lies, a gentle and aware path that is available for us when we are ready.

It has been my experience that the first step is learning how to come into consciousness to feel our bodies and ask our intuition what that next aligned step is. Think about this. Can you check in with your body before making a decision? Sometimes we know that a decision is not the best (greasy pizza, a reactive text response, gossip that drains energy). The baby steps are about taking a moment to PAUSE and then respond in a more aligned manner. This builds self-trust and courage for us to do it again next time, continuing the new pattern of pausing and checking in before we take action.

Moving away from our busy minds that are like robots doing the same silly thing over and over and moving into our inner wisdom that has the answers. We also have to learn how to trust this process as we have been on autopilot our entire lives just going through the motions in our cozy little comfort zone of pushing repeat.

This is the secret sauce. We can go through an entire day in our survival nervous system state and miss all of the beautiful moments and have zero recollection. This was my story for years. I am so grateful for my kids who are my barometer to keep me present and engaged. They are the first to invite me to play, or call me out. They always remind me of what state I am in, filling my day with laughter and joy, and witnessing their experience of being in the present moment is motivating and settling.

If you are in a place where you truly believe that your inner compass can guide you, rather than your busy mind, and, you are willing to get uncomfortable to create change then you are halfway there! This is not an easy path, however, it is the path to freedom, inner connection, and living the life you only imagined for yourself.

After years of trying too hard, I feel that these points below are the most crucial steps to slowly taking my power back and learning about who I am and what I want.

5 Ways to Live a More Present and Connected Life

1. Meditation:

This is always my first recommendation and it is always the hardest one. Committing to a daily meditation practice has allowed me to learn how to move away from my busy mind and into my body and breath. Meditation is now the most important part of my day. This is where the real work/magic happens. Meditation restores my faith in myself that I can be present in the moment, settle into the stillness, and calm my busy mind. This is Hard Work! Sometimes unbearable. Just like anything else, the more we practice, the easier it becomes.

If I can follow through on my promise to myself for 10-40 minutes a day to sit in stillness and quiet my mind then I can build my confidence to do even more challenging things for myself. I so often hear, “I don’t know how to meditate” and this is why I offer private sessions and an online course dedicated to a daily meditation practice something that you crave, rather than dread.

The particular attention to connecting inward; how the breath enters and leaves the body, allows us to move away from the busy mind, and enter a world of embodiment; where we explore the sensation of coming into the body. When take a deep dive into tuning into our breath we naturally permit our minds to move into the present moment. For many of us, we may have been outside of our bodies, in our minds and not in the present moment. This is where the rewiring of the brain begins.

2. Movement

I teach and practice slow/restorative yoga. I am not interested in being able to pull my leg behind my head or use yoga as exercise. The importance of yoga is that I give myself permission to experience what it feels like to be connected to my body and my breath which then moves me away from spending time in worry or fear.

I use the Asana (posture) pillar of yoga to ground my physical body so that it is easier for me to sit in stillness and tune into the subtle energy. When I am practicing these poses I am forced to be in the present moment, focus on my breath and be in my body.

3. Checking In:

It is astonishing to discover that 95% of our thoughts are the same thoughts that we had yesterday This sounds simple, but this is the first step. Find times throughout the day to check in with yourself. Are you clenching, gripping, tense? What is the tone of your breath; short, rigid, flowing? What are your thoughts?

Checking in with myself regularly (sometimes minute by minute) is a tool that reminds me that I hold a conscious desire to be present. That I am making a strong choice to not live on auto-pilot, but rather attune myself to the new and more connected person who feels regulated and free. I now choose to wake up! To build new neural pathways within my nervous system that cultivate trust in my intuition, that my body will provide the answer that I need in that moment if I am conscious enough.

So many years of my life were spent in zombie mode, going through the motions and unaware of how to connect to my deeper knowing. Have you asked yourself these questions, “what makes me happy, what is my passion, what is my purpose, what lights me up?” This brings us closer to understanding who we are at our core.

4. Community:

Who are your peeps? How deep are your conversations? Do you find yourself fulfilled and inspired after spending time with them? When I lived in Costa Rica it was so easy for me to find my tribe. Read my blog post: Why We Moved Home from Costa Rica to learn more about how connecting with other families came so easy and was such an important part of my healing. When I moved home from Costa Rica most of my friends had moved away and there was an incredible amount of alone time. This was hard at first, really hard, but I realize that this opportunity was created for me to make space to attract some very special and aligned people back into my circle to create meaningful and deep connections. Alone time also inspired me to create women’s circles in San Diego. that is a huge part of my passion as gathering women in ceremony to create a brave space for us to remind each other that we are not alone.

5. Service:

The best way to get out of self is to offer your time and energy to those who need it much more than you do. There are so many projects that need our help and there is no better feeling than being of service. When you are helping another person, suddenly the hardships you are experiencing seem to disappear. It is a lovely exchange that the world needs more of.

I am blessed with the opportunity to live a sober life for over 12 years now and am actively involved with the fellowship of AA. I am so lucky to have a program that shows me how to live my life with integrity, and honesty and hold myself accountable when I make mistakes. One of the reasons I created my business is because I realized that people who are not in AA don’t have a program to follow. It is hard to find a way to feel better and move toward your passion without a guidebook, community and people to show you the way. We can be that for others!

If you are in San Diego and are looking for a volunteer opportunity We See You San Diego is a great organization that serves over 200 un-housed guests a beautiful dinner experience that involves a coffee bar, “Blessingdales” (a clothing store where they can replenish clothing needs), a hygiene bar for them to restock supplies, a live band and several volunteers who come together to offer these guests a weekly warm plated meal. My kids and I have created a monthly commitment and it is a night they look forward to and love to be involved in.

Where Do You Begin?

We begin by taking a deep breath, allowing ourselves to settle into the present moment. This is where we release any shame or self-judgment, creating space for calmness and self-compassion to emerge.

We acknowledge that this journey is a powerful and gradual process, one that invites patience rather than the pursuit of instant results. It is an awakening, a reawakening that gently rewires our thoughts, beliefs, and behaviors to align more deeply with our true essence.

Together, we embrace this transformative path, recognizing that each breath and step forward brings us closer to a life of greater purpose, authenticity, and soul connection.